Last Sunday, I walked along Atlantic from my home in Cobble Hill in the autumn sunshine and hung a left when I saw the sign for Hanson.  Tucked on a sweet side street called St Felix, the Brooklyn Waldorf School is located inside an old-fashioned building that immediately feels like home.  Established in 2004, Brooklyn Waldorf serves families with children ages 3 through Fourth Grade, with plans to unfold a new grade each year, through Grade 8.  I had not heard of a Waldorf educational model before learning of this open house, but my sister (a librarian in PA) mentioned that she had visited a Waldorf School in Pittsburgh (http://www.waldorfpittsburgh.org) as an alternative option for her very sensitive and bright daughter when they moved (there are 900 Waldorf schools in 83 countries), explaining that teachers incorporate a great deal of “sensory experiences” into their lessons.  I had no idea how true that theme would become through my tour that afternoon.

When I entered the unassuming doorway, a young admissions rep named Tess greeted me with a smile and checked off my name from her list.  Tess gave an overview of the school and invited us to spend as much time as possible in each classroom.  Immediately struck by an enticing aroma of lavender (or thyme?), I followed my nose into the pre-K classroom, painted a peaceful peach and filled with sunlight from the street.  While the teacher talked about making applesauce and candles with the children, I looked around at the community table, toys, dishes, and pine cones that bordered the classroom—though it seemed more like a life-size doll house from my dreams.  A soothing voice outlined the daily routine to prospective parents, and when the teacher said that they start the day by lighting a candle and reading a poem together “just about the joy of being alive,” the story was instantly over for me:  I wanted to press the ‘rewind button’ and live my childhood over again….Here.

I wandered upstairs and became even more enamored with the cozy classrooms with views of tree-lined Brooklyn streets framed by soft cloth curtains.  Every chalkboard was intricately decorated with a scene illustrating the theme of that week, much like a page from one of my huge picture books from home.  A riddle on the 2nd grade chalkboard asked, “Why should you not tell secrets on the farm?” and of course I had to discover the solution, so the teacher shared the answer with a gentle smile, “Because the corn has ears and the potatoes have eyes.”  I marveled at the colorful cursive letters of the alphabet and enchanting characters in chalk before continuing on my journey upstairs to the 4th Grade classroom.  This teacher had similar artwork on her black board, so I inquired further about each educator’s background, discovering that the Waldorf model is one that encourages both students and teachers to develop their gifts.  Each grade has a “humanities theme” for the year, starting with fairy tales and moving into myths, fables & legends, and spiritual stories from the Old Testament/Torah.  Somehow, hearing this background made me feel as if I was surrounded by all of my old, favorite friends and have to admit that the joyful creativity of each class was almost palpable.

What’s also especially impressive about Brooklyn Waldorf is the attention to detail not only with creativity in the curriculum but also grammatical details.  As I read some student samples of stories, it was obvious that there is an eye for exactness, and the Fourth Grade teacher confirmed teaching the foundational basics as components of a wholistic language approach to complement the exciting concepts.  This information was confirmed by a handout of the Third Grade Syllabus which read, “Sept 9-Oct 2:  Daily painting and writing of the days of creation from Genesis.  Introduction to grammar, parts of speech, spelling, and punctuation through the stories of Adam and Eve…Gardening and harvesting, cooking.”  The Brooklyn Waldorf education integrates music with math, movement with language, responsibility with jobs, nature with trips to the park (rain or shine—).

There are additional tours this year, and I must encourage you to make time for one of them:

November 8th (3-5pm)

November 16th (6-8pm)

March 8th (6-8pm)

I wanted to join the circle of parents in the meeting at 4pm in the beautiful open room of windows, wooden floors and ballet bars, but it was time for me to go—and yet, I must say…I do hope that I return someday.  Seeing Brooklyn Waldorf was an experience I planned in order to help my clients, but I must admit that it mostly reassured and inspired me—if I ever have a daughter, I know there’s an educational option where we wouldn’t just feel “safe and supported” in this eclectic borough of Brooklyn:  the Waldorf School is a place where I know we would wake in anticipation of joining every day.  When I got home later that evening and my mom asked, “How was your tour?” I replied, “I would beg, borrow, and steal to get my future daughter into that school—it was a dream!”

Luckily, you don’t have to resort to those methods:  probably the best part of this independent school, originally designed by Rudolf Steiner in 1919, is that it is committed to diversity through their “Three Tier Tuition.”  Read more on their website (www.brooklynwaldorf.org) about this unique and nurturing educational environment that “…responds to the developmental phases of children, fosters academic success as well as emotional and social intelligence, and connects children to nature and their communities.”

While I’ve taught a full semester of sophomore English in the Upper School and served as a substitute for over three years, it just made sense to jump on the bandwagon and observe what it’s like to see Packer “from the outside, in.”  Before reading on, you must know that I am completely prejudiced when it comes to this particular topic—Packer is not only a beautiful, old school nestled on a tree-lined street in Brooklyn Heights, it’s also become a sort of “second home.”  If I had found Packer while teaching in my 20’s, it’s fairly certain I would have settled in and never left…As it is, I was tremendously honored to serve both as sub and as interim teacher for my dear friend and late Prep-for-Prep colleague, Linda Gold.

Needless to say, there are poignant memories for me inside this ivy-covered landmark building, established in 1845 as the first private school in the city for young women.  Becoming co-ed in 1972, Packer now celebrates both history and diversity in its eclectic student population—and I can attest that its hallmark achievement, beyond the lyrical and lovely aesthetic, is that this is a beehive of intellectual curiosity.  Packer kids love to challenge ideas while at the same time supporting each other’s journey:  the Mission states that the school wants students to “Think Deeply, Speak Confidently, To Act with Purpose and Heart.”

And that’s exactly what the administrators did when they presented introductory speeches to those visiting this past Tuesday morning.  Jason Caldwell, Director of Admissions for the Middle/Upper School, demonstrated an uncanny sense of ‘emotional literacy’ by asking attendees about their level of discomfort and then sharing how he too was initially unsure about the school when he interviewed—but quickly found that Packer was both welcoming and warm.  Susan Feibelman, Upper School Division Head, and Bruce Dennis, Head of School, also shared their past educational experiences and connected to Jason’s love of movies—which became a thematic thread demonstrating the school’s strength:  cutting-edge creativity combined with intellectual connection.

Standing on the stage of the set for The Tempest, the Upper School’s fall play, these administrators acknowledged that the academic journey can be a little “intense” at times, but they highlighted the truth about Packer:  in many ways, this community offers an “eye in the storm” that looks both out to the world in service and into the soul of learning.  I warned you that I’m biased—yes, there are parts of Packer that could be improved, but that’s for another column.  Today, what I can tell you is that I wore a name tag with pride and sat in the back row with a smile, both impressed and intrigued.

Leaving Packer, one of the Admissions reps stopped to ask me how things went, and I smiled with reassurance, giving her a “thumbs-up” and said, “A+!”  Like many of their students, the faculty and staff had presented the school’s external appearance with polish and finesse—but at the same time offered an inner authenticity that is accessible and rare in this competitive city.  Pushing the heavy oval door into the brisk autumn air, I wished that I could linger to hear the Student Panel or pop in for one of the many college visits scheduled that day or just read in the cozy library beside Richard Brownstone, a wonderful gem in the English department—and perhaps that is what is best about Packer:  the experience, though mixed with the highs and lows of real learning—is still one that, no matter how old we grow, we don’t want to completely leave behind.  Although it was time to re-emerge into the bustling streets of Brooklyn, I walked out of Packer Collegiate Institute both renewed and energized…

Situated just off Court on 195 State Street, A. Fantis Parochial School (www.afantis.org) looks much like a storefront posed on the edge of the part of town nicknamed “MetroTech.”  Trying to dismiss this cold impression, I attempted maneuvering past a deliveryman in the doorway as about fifteen little ones ran down the stairs, shouting in plaid uniforms.  Backing up against a wall to accommodate other parents emerging, I followed my nose upstairs, where coffee and pastries withered on a small table in a cafeteria-style auditorium.

Feeling a bit awkward, I looked for an “in”—perhaps a flier, a teacher wearing a name-tag, educational handouts, or even a posted agenda.  No such luck.  I couldn’t discern exactly who was the principal and who was a parent, and while it was obvious that one of the individuals was discussing admission, there was no clear information about just what was happening or what I could do to see the educational environment provided for children.  Glancing around for any clue, I noticed that a few of the adults were holding manila folders, nodding—but even the idea of a cookie couldn’t keep me:  I had important errands to run…despite the chilling rain.

It would have been nice to learn more, as A. Fantis Parochial provides educational opportunities for pre-K through 8th grade, but it seems that this was anything but an “open” house:  apparently, there’s a code that I couldn’t quite crack about this particular school culture.  The best thing I can say about this experience is that I took notes—lessons can be learned from any “rainy-day dead-end.”   It might have just been a refresher, but first impressions really do matter, and you have to feel welcome at the front door…or it’s probably best to just move along.  Perhaps what I can provide in my investigative educational endeavors is that I’ve saved you some time and energy.  My hope is that A. Fantis Parochial School will soon be forgotten, much like my soggy, rain-drenched gloves…

When I arrived at 55 East 84th Street for the annual open house, the line wound around the block, and I said shyly to a mom standing next to me, “Nice that it’s not raining today!”  She smiled in response, and soon we started chatting about her family:  the eldest son attends Xavier and the quiet 8th grader beside her is currently enrolled at a neighborhood school in New Jersey.

This mother provided a brief glimpse of the application process at Regis:  basically, boys are invited to apply if they have demonstrated leadership potential, proven academic excellence, and practice Roman Catholicism.  Just as we began delving into whether there are other religions represented at this school, two very articulate young men approached and asked if we had any questions, so I jumped right in…

After several inquiries about favorite classes and teachers, I explored the topic of discipline with “Enrique,” who told me about JUG:  “Justice Under God,” a fitting and somewhat humorous title for detention.  I dug deeper and questioned, “What if you don’t know the line for respect—perhaps you engage in a class discussion and become passionate, but the instructor thinks you’ve been disruptive or even disrespectful?”  Enrique blinked once and instantly replied with a grin, “If that’s your personality, I highly recommend joining our debate team—” whereupon he shared details about his latest speech meet at Staten Island.  Of course I found myself shaking my head in admiration at this gregarious young man in his royal blue blazer, funky black glasses, and cardinal-red tie who absolutely “sold me” before I ever entered the building.

The hour on line spun by quickly while we enjoyed the polite and engaging responses of three different freshmen, and then we were ushered into an atrium, where we waited again for a welcome speech inside a cozy auditorium.  One of the school’s administrators presented a slide show that made me laugh at several junctures as he made light of the history and tradition of this selective school with graduates from the likes of Yale, Brown, and the United States Naval Academy.  Established in 1914 by Father David Hearn, Regis is the only private high school in the country that is free-–a vision fueled by Jesuit priests who modeled their approach to teaching on St. Ignatius Loyola, who had “an abiding faith in the power of education to transform students’ lives…and desired that Jesuits run tuition-free schools available to all students who were qualified—’for everybody, poor and rich.’ ”

Walking through the sunlit halls painted yellow in this landmark building, a sense of goodness and order permeates five flights of old-fashioned classrooms filled with straight rows of green desks and views of tree-lined streets on the Upper East Side.  There is a deep echo of history and legacy here, and as I passed the debate trophies and athletic photos from many decades ago, a memory of Dead Poets Society seeped into me.  “The Boys” spoke of studying hard but of balancing their lives to accommodate homework with other activities—one young man admitted that he found the schedule grueling to arrive home at 8pm every night in Brooklyn, after soccer practice, but this articulate freshman seemed much older than his years as he expressed learning how to juggle the demands of a being a winning scholar/athlete.  Standing on the polished oak floor of the basketball gym with ancient pendants behind him, I imagined so many other young men before “Tim”—had much changed besides an account on Facebook?  Yes, the school is now wireless, with 150 new computers and 23/25 rooms sporting smart boards—but what abides at Regis High is a sort of a timeless intellectual curiosity mixed with very humble pride.

There are no transfers so you get only one shot, but it’s not accurate that 8th grade boys have to be invited to apply—our student tour guide encouraged us to pick up an application on our way out of the building, and I felt myself wishing that someday I too could have a son who would take a tour and feel the power and majesty of this exciting Jesuit tradition.  Alas—as a Baptist minister’s daughter, the chance that I will convert into a practicing Roman Catholic are rather slim, but “The Boys” gave me new hope on an old holiday that America is still a land of opportunity if one is willing to work hard.   I left Regis feeling a little regal—proud to be in such an eclectic city that provides, still today, a free private school which educates “Men for Others”—and I won’t soon forget the bright smiles of these bright young men, with their tentative confidence and eager desire to reach out.

What was interesting, however, was that my one-on-one tutoring clients from the regular school year became students in a more traditional classroom setting, and I was able to observe their habits as learners…So it suddenly became very clear why “enrichment” was a good idea for many of these individuals—not because they weren’t intelligent or capable or even interested…but because they sometimes weren’t entirely ENGAGED.

Everyone has a subject that really drives and delights them—for my dad, it was sports.  He can recall the details and particulars from just about any St. Louis Cardinals game that was ever played on this planet.  For my mom, her scene is Scrabble—she can often be heard remarking the words, “Oooh—that word has never been played on the board before!” because in this particular arena, she definitely has a photographic memory.

But ask my dad to explain a problem in algebra or require my mom to merge into major highway traffic, and both individuals suddenly fall flat.  The results are often abysmal.  Why?  They just didn’t tune in to the nuances required to develop that specific skill— for lack of a better way to phrase it, they just “couldn’t be bothered” when they had the opportunity to clue into details for these particular lessons…

It’s okay that my dad hires an accountant and that my mom sticks to the side roads when running errands, but what if they had to ‘pass a class’ in these “subjects” now?  Both of them would have to change their approach dramatically.  And this is the heart of learning:  change.  The skills that come quickly for us are ones that are natural and easy—and because they are already fun, we get more engaged with doing them even better—again supporting the old adage that “success breeds success.”  When we don’t enjoy an activity, on the other hand, we begin to avoid and ignore important signs and signals, and herein lies the true crux of my point….

Each of my kids this summer was intelligent and gifted—but every one of them reached a moment when they just “checked out” of the learning scene, for whatever reason.  As a result, key concepts were missed, and a foundation for future learning was lost—that familiar awful spiral.  We’re all human, but the key to preventing future road blocks this fall is creating a way to literally ‘rise above the mundane’ and find a way to Get ENGAGED in order to stay in the game of learning—somehow, some way…

Looking ahead at future classes and inevitable challenges as we approach a new school year, I encourage both parents and educators to “translate” skills that already flourish into areas of weakness.  For example, if you have a kid that’s a good cook on your hands but struggling in math, learn how to “parallel” following the directions of a recipe with forming a theorem in geometry.  If, on the other hand, you have a child who is “afraid of the ball” (as I was in gym) but a talented musician, link the skills in sports to an aspect of music—like “hitting a note” or “catching a tune,” so that the sense of already established success is readily available and accessible to transfer into a foundation of confidence for the more daunting activity.

When we can train the brain to feel ENGAGED, even on the smallest scale, kids often learn, despite their original apathy, and that’s when life can become suprisingly fun.  On a positive note (and on behalf of my talented parents!) my mom now changes lanes successfully through the complicated byways of Pittsburgh in order to see her three grandchildren and coordinate transportation for their demanding after-school activites.  And my dad—well, he found a way to earn a PhD from Princeton (despite an aversion to equations) in order to become a seminary president.  Both of my parents navigated a way into what matters most to them, and your children can too.  Even if “disinterest” can sometimes feel like a dancing gremlin who often wins, there is always a point of entry into the world of discovery.  As E.M. Forster so aptly wrote, “Only connect…” and at the Clifton Corner, we’re looking forward to connecting with You this fall!

“One of psychology’s open secrets is the relative inability of grades, IQ, or SAT scores, despite their popular mystiques, to predict unerringly who will succeed in life…There are widespread exceptions to the rule that IQ predicts success—many (or more) exceptions than cases that fit the rule.  At best, IQ contributes about 20 percent to the factors that determine life success, which leaves 80 percent to other forces” writes Daniel Goleman in his book, Working with Emotional Intelligence, [this excerpt quoted from the publication, LILIPOH, Spring 2009 Edition].

What are these other forces?  Social/Emotional Intelligence is a factor that more and more educators are starting to recognize as a significant indicator, not only for individual achievement but for school-wide success.  As a Program Coach for Emotional Literacy at Yale University, I am seeing results in classrooms of the Brooklyn Catholic Schools that are a testament to this research.   Through coaching ten teachers during the past school year, I’ve heard amazing results about how the curriculum of Emotional Literacy is able to transform disengaged and/or disinterested students into class leaders and achievers.

You may have a son or daughter who has a wonderful way of including other kids or taking a stand—but is frustrated and downhearted that these gifts are not recognized on the Honor Roll or during Achievement Night.  Please don’t underestimate the skill your child is directly demonstrating each and every day:  a type of intelligence that is valued on college campuses,  heavily considered for many prestigious scholarships, and sought by corporations with highly-prized internships. Social and emotional intelligence is actually often the ‘tipping point’ between the student with a stellar SAT score but mediocre faculty evaluations and the kid (Yours!) who didn’t perform as well on a standardized test but won rave reviews from his teacher recommendations.  For example, on a recent parent-post through a Yahoo group, I read again how The Beacon School in New York City uses grades and test scores as a starting place for considering student applications but that the personal portfolio and interview are even more strongly weighed for admission.  Being able to communicate effectively with an administrator during a school visit is what can—and often does—”seal the deal.”  The skills used during this discussion?  You got it:  emotional and social ones.

So fuel the long-term vision about the gifts of Your Unique Kid, and then find a way to recognize these contributions now—don’t expect an outside source or organization to take the lead!  You may want to design a special “Family Day” to honor their consistent  investment in emotional and social intelligence or create a space on your family bulletin board to highlight when and how your child is shaping the world.  Don’t underestimate the power of this recognition—I have a simple white board in my tutoring studio where kids can fill out a star or heart when they’ve accomplished a daunting task and they love posting this symbol for everyone to see.

For more discussion about these ideas and a glimpse of “My Honor Roll,” check out www.cliftoncorner.com and view the June Cornerstone through the menu link called “Currently at the Corner.”

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“There can be no knowledge without emotion.  We may be aware of a truth, yet until we have felt its force, it is not ours.  To the cognition of the brain must be added the experience of the soul.”

–Arnold Bennett, Britist critic & essayist, 1867-1931